had to help some very inhibited women overcome their hangups about sex and their own sexuality and an aspect of the approach is the ‘overpowering’ masculine element.

I know this phenomenon. I have had long conversations with friends about those hangups. I understand where these girls are coming from — I had Catholic schooling— but it still annoys me. Like you mentioned your contempt for those who engage in diaper play, I’m holding such contempt for those who would need to blame someone for enjoying sex.

Just to be clear on this, the problem isnt the overpowering masculine element. That’s fine. I want some of that too. It’s the complete lack of owning up to their own desires. It’s great that you were able to help some of them. They do need help, I wish everyone who’s struggling with this problem help. The back of my mind is just screaming “for fuck’s sake, you’re so weak!”

years of having to stand up for myself against a constant drip-to-flow of put-downs, snide critique in the form of “I’m only trying to help you”, passive-aggression

Sorry you had to go through that, but good for you! I wish I would have stood up much sooner. I just went quiet. That doesn’t help either.

If they’re so weak they can’t do the right thing then do it for them.

Ha, yeah. In hindsight that’s clear as day. That epiphany is going to take some time when they have you convinced you are the weak one.

you seem pretty able to state an opinion

Thank you. Been over 5 years, here’s to hoping the damage is healed and the lessons last a lifetime *raises coffee mug*

without needing to get all defensive to me

You surprised me into laughing out loud here. Defensive? What, on this conversation? How…would that even work? It’s all been completely subjective. I’m not going into online conversations expecting to even change minds let alone someone’s sexual preferences.

remind you that what seems normal to each of us because everyone we know does it doesn’t mean it is … in fact most people don’t do it — never lose sight of the fact that you and your friends are a minority … not if you value your life and liberty.

Agreed. BUT taken in the context of our conversation (I am so enjoying your word choices) vanilla is actually the minority, if you take all other flavors as one group. Although my kink is not your kink, get a bunch of people together you will end up with more (incompatible) kinksters than vanillas.

If that’s the excuse you need to keep talking to me about sex

I’ll be doing nothing but thinking, writing and reading about sex and relationships all next month. Aren’t you lucky? :)

It’s my NaNoWriMo. I’m finishing a story I started almost 2 years ago now.

Writer of fiction, blogs and erotica. Frequency in that order. Popularity in reverse.

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